In this blog post, you can find the summary of my week 1 in 30 days challenge self filming series. I challenged myself to film a video for 30 days to improve my confidence. Let’s see how it worked from my first week.
00:00 Day 1 | The Beginning
I’m 100% Vietnamese, and I like speaking English, I don’t know why. I do most things in English. Maybe, I was a Western guy in many of my past lives. I find an easy connection to English. Although, I still love my mother tongue, Vietnamese. It’s hard to explain. Hopefully I can find the answer in the future.
I work as a Business Analyst in the Banking/Finance industry. Before, I hated the industry. But, I work for it now, that’s weird. The quality and quantity of my work are fair enough. Recently, I don’t do that much, because I get faster on my tasks. So, I don’t focus at work.
03:50 Day 2 | My Failure and Back-to-Work Circumstance
I was not productive during the day, and I didn’t do much. My passion has declined for my job. I don’t want to work, and I don’t understand why. I may reach peak performance. Back to the workforce after 2 gap years, and now I feel a bit of demotivation.
I got some reward from the company after 6 months of working. The reward was “Staff of the quarter”. And it’s weird that I got the reward. It’s great to know I still have some performance.
Before reentering the workforce, I experimented with various ventures. I experienced numerous setbacks, including closing a company, failing as a freelancer, and attempting to become a YouTuber unsuccessfully. These failures provided valuable insights into my strengths and weaknesses.
Now, I’m back to challenge myself for 30 days. I will film myself and upload to YouTube. Let’s see how far I can go. It’s a chance for me to practice speaking in front of a camera. Practice makes perfect.
09:03 Day 3 | Demo Stuff and My Concerns
It’s a rainy day. It reduces the temperature a lot in Hồ Chí Minh city. Let’s visit Hồ Chí Minh city sometimes in a different season. This city has the rainy and sunny seasons. We’ll know how hot it is in the sunny season. And we’ll know how traffic gets chaos when it’s raining.
Today, I did a demonstration to stakeholders about the new feature that was implemented by my team. And the demo was great, my presentation was good. Everybody is happy, including me.
It’s another day I recorded myself. Whatever device we have, just press the button and record ourselves. The goal is to record ourselves daily.
I heard that someone is willing to replace my position and work as a Business Analyst. I was afraid because recently I was getting lazier due to getting familiar with the work. And I’m careless about what surrounds me. But I know for sure, I must prepare for the worst case. I did it all the time. However, I’m scared of being replaced, cause I’ll not know what to do after that.
I had more energy when I wore the light color cloth. Usually, I get more energy on Wednesday of the week.
Be humble and prepare for the worst. We must treat ourselves well and understand ourselves better than anyone else. Think and figure out.
17:56 Day 4 | Performance Review
I’ve been a Business Analyst for 7 years. It’s all about communication, negotiation, analysis, and persuasion. 50-50 on liking it. Worked in different areas with lots of stakeholders. Lots of meetings and discussions to get requirements.
I hate meetings, especially long ones. They waste time and aren’t great for sharing ideas. The longer the meeting, the worse it is. Too many meetings drain energy and don’t help us create. Some people love meetings, even if they’re not productive. Ideal meetings are short (15-20 minutes) with prepared participants, ensuring everyone’s on the same page during discussions.
I did not feel pressure from the work. But I feel pressure from my thought of quitting the job. And sure in the future I’ll quit and do something else. We must be here and there to explore and enjoy the journeys ourselves. Sticking with a job could be the purpose of someone out there, but not me.
I DON’T KNOW HOW I CAN QUIT MY JOB YET. Everyday is just like a fight of my thoughts. People on this planet Earth will have a tough time and they must make decisions anyway. That’s life, and it is what it is.
Performance review, what is it? A revision session that company will hold with a person, and other stakeholders. Then, the employer will decide what you can do to improve in the future to fit the company requirements.
After the performance review, I feel OK but I did not think I want to work with the company in the long-term. I’m making up my mind to continue contributing to an organization. Or I’ll quit and go on my own path. Because, the contract between my company and its partner is coming to an end. And things need time to grow, I must understand more about myself first. Then, we can go outside our comfort zone.
27:13 Day 5 | Friday Working Like Weekend
Today, I recorded in the morning. Friday is the weekend as I believe. We need time to relax and chill a bit to prepare for next week. We wrap up things on Friday and then we can start our next week faster.
I have a chance to work from home twice a week according to my company’s policies. So I can sometimes relax. And I don’t believe in productivity from working from home. The performance will be lower.
I usually surround myself with people who are busy with their stuff, so I can get inspired. Like I go to the coffee shop and start doing my stuff. Sure, things will get smoother.
Exploring ourselves is a journey, and we’ll get great rewards when we get to the end. The more we understand about ourselves, the more we can achieve in life. We can do it anyway if we want it most.
I like to be alone with myself, and I have other ways to express my feelings. Drawing and writing are my ways to make up my mind and meditate. Sometimes, I listen to music (lo-fi music) to calm my mind.
I do song covers when I have free time, and most are Vietnamese songs. Cause I know how to express the emotion from the lyrics and melodies of the songs. Watch my Vietnamese song covers here.
Other videos are about multiple topics such as lifestyle, story, experience, and mindset. Maybe, I’ll share my artwork process.